My Crusade against Poverty, Hunger & Illiteracy

4th of July came and rhetoric eulogies were sung for the great declaration guaranteeing equality, life, liberty and a pursuit of happiness since 1776... The orator this time talked of long pending issues like equality of tax treatment, liberty of afghans, life to tired soldiers and a pursuit of happiness for prisoners in Bay area. The Indian media excelling at drawing parallels, unfailingly and spontaneously, produced evidences that how screwed up we still are and hence should be embarrassed yet again to mark the occasion of America's cake cutting...Intellectual diversity of recalled shames ranged from consistent failures of PMO to do an Indian 'The Kings Speech' act for a long muted man at top, to occasional failures of corporate in deciphering a legal protection model out of 'The Social Network' experience..and thus not only save assess but earn their faces an 'India Shinning' smile on centerfold of magazines for Aam admi to treasure

After these few innovative analogical insights they resorted to those age old BBC footages against which we have kinda biologically evolved with thick skin..thus I kept ignoring them comfortably before the clips got Americanized. I usually am quite composed unless served with anything English.. hence an outsourced impulsive nationalist fervor invaded me. Somewhere in this attentive segment a young attractive fella's pic was featured with a running caption "Ask not what your country has done for you ask what you have done for your country".. Both 'Made in US' and 'Inspiring', irresistible deathly combo.. A reverse psychology I attach with politicians.. and first asked what has my country done for me.. answer was quick in coming...Well for me the still a student..my country established institutes of technology and institutes of management making my quota of the universal summers of 69' miserably desperate..

What made me ponder long was recollecting What I have done for it..Excuse me for thinking meanwhile read things I sacrificed doing to stand by the ideals my countrymen supposedly believes in.. For dignity of the nation builders I controlled temptations of using swear words for incompetency... For Gandhi Sake I controlled violent uprisings against assholes I pledged as my brothers in school assembly, unaware who they were parented by.. In the name of Right to information I controlled impulses to rebuke at caste curious people... As a gesture of respect to feminine honor I controlled perversion for the same.. Believing in freedom of expression I controlled desires to sue the press for making us feel screwed up until Sachin scores..

Done with that??.. I am also done with thinking.. So talking of greater goods of eliminating poverty, hunger and illetracy.. Boss my life is nothing but a series of events culminating to these ends.. But since a secular me follows Buddha too, still complying to 'Hindi chini bhai bhai' theory, I believe self-conquest precedes all.. A student (learner) that I am, so I am overcoming India's challenge of poverty, hunger and illiteracy at the unit of self..

What is poverty?? Not having the means to satisfy your basic needs.. ryt?? My struggle against poverty is a tale of persuasive tears.. As a child I wished to be a cricketer.. but I had this poverty of talent.. so I struggled to defend my wicket by mostly crooks and threats (I owned the kit).. later the attention to cricket no more remained undivided.. how come that fella has a better cycle??..poverty of flamboyance.. I cried till no end till I got better one.. My growing love for movies with people around suggesting studies was taken as poverty of entertainment.. I cried on most Fridays and got results by next Sundays.. then I grew hormone wise.. How come that fella has a girlfriend and I don't.. poverty of love..Had persuasive tears been the key here I could have been something....Sad!!

What is hunger?? Not having enough ice creams after that stomach full of meat.!! Being served with usual staples when all you need so desperately is Maggie!!..etc etc.. Now this I managed through sycophancy and sweet-talks. In facts all my people skill can find their origin in that figurative sense of rat race which existed even before capitalism conceived in the womb of time.. Once this struggle against hunger conflicted with the desire to overcome poverty of love..I tell you the fear of gaining weight and the associated extra stuffs you need to chew to distract your thoughts from it is a real catch 22 situation.. Anyway before it was too late I was done with the mathematics of pros & cons and success probability with each endeavor.. and pursued my taste buds.

What is illiteracy?? In broader sense ignorance of performing unnatural tasks.. ryt??.. this part of my struggle against the darkness of ignorance, is marked with the Darwinian strategy of adaptive evolution and natural selections.. like not knowing how to do my assignments..I mastered coping it..Not knowing the means to get lab results empirically..I bribed the lab assistant..Not Knowing how to pass the coming exams.. I made micromini furreys..Not knowing how to articulate the cool stuffs to amuse people around.. I joined social networking..and I can multiply these examples.. but already I have gone too long.

A quick feedback analysis of the efforts shows ample positive results approving that I have performed excellently.. my assortment of poverty is almost singular now.. I have progressively kept up with higher end of BMI spectrum since inception.. and they say my knowledge is apt to fetch me enough ice creams and bribe all the regulators on my way to grave..

Saturday Sessions Settling Squares

I still vividly remember how as a kid I hated the unemployed. Not that I was class conscious capitalist-in-the-making or a nationalist who simply couldn't withstand the unproductive population burden they were instead of meaningful human resources guiding economic development at least till 2020. My detest was solely based on envious notions they filled me with every passing hour of the day.

Early in the morning while being forced to school I saw them either still snoring or waiting for bed tea. Just imagine how heavy a sight it would have been for a little kid who with celestial punctuality sacrificed the desires to snooze the alarm till infinity on a daily basis. The actively unemployed were found at the nukkad brushing teeth and skimming through newspapers simultaneously. Many a times I had an uneasy urge to bring to an end this shameless display of multitasking when they had entire day to fool around. I mean when my father, a regular 9 to 5 employed man, religiously devotes half an hour of undivided attention to national, state and local affairs (only taking annual pauses after an IAS topper interview to try instill in me a sense of aspiration which mostly were taken as embarrassments) what rights did these people had to make Page-3 skimming appear as a skillful art. Anyway, back then being a client of an hegemonic employed class of Ministry of education and HRD, I lacked time and energy to address the greatly needed social reform.

During afternoon on the bus back from school I intentionally avoided the window seat only to ignore the advanced model of this human specimen debating energetically on trivial issues (to me) of paramount significance (to them) on each and every tea stall and paan shop; their practice ground for parliament and state assembly. The degree of irresponsibility and unaccountability enjoyed by them when put to contrast with the answerable employed class only made me feel further pity for my future life as not being one among them. The admiration of their lifestyle coupled with my helplessness, further fuelled my hatred. The realization that even if I lived up to Dreams from my father I still would end up working under someone like them sank me to the depths of hopelessness for the destination my studies were taking me to.

Evenings were worst cause often when I was very close to a double digit score my mother signalled me to call it a day, pack my kit and retreat into the final pavilion not out.. to attend homework (as if I worked lesser in School) whereas these fellas were eventful pursuing their favorite work.. bird watching that was, euphemistically. The only solace (later a regret) was that there were not many beautiful nests around...but I was not aware that those broad minded intelligentsia came with no bars... and occasionally even migrated long distances in ornithological pursuits.

Now coming to why I recall this deep rooted and long subjugated hatred.. Its all because of the sight of those school kids cheerfully returning home while I am having my lunch break. So it turns out that while as a school kid I envied the unemployed class I too was a matter of envy for the working class.. (makes childhood look less pathetic now) ... and the working class itself was the envy of the unemployed.. specially so in nuptial age group... What a Vicious circle of envy and desire...!!

Anyway on Saturday mornings I take a tangential path by making sure to sip tea after tea near the bus stop when the school bus is about to arrive..

Internship Diaries

I believe a man is at his best when working, hence I actively think to act on something to bring the best of me. And when acting on nothing its not procrastination (save that for some lazy fella) but the wait for perfectionism that stops me. A perfectionist I am and have been patiently waiting for most of my life. Though this waiting never left me idle, my business is statically fashioned amidst wishful 'Ifs' and 'Buts'. Landing in Bangalore for summer internship I expected the stay to be a perfectly designed platform to witness my best. Luckily by Delhi standards there was no summer, and unfortunately even by some Pony-Tail Management Insti. standard there was no internship to be found.

First day by far was most hectic when the HR made us fill multiple forms and run from this work room to that work room looking for a Xerox. A Competitive current flowed in the gallery with each of the 20 odd intern marching briskly (almost jogging) to outpace others against the fear of being queued. Prepared I had came, I saw the work room first and conquest was compromised only with second spot. Yes I just quoted on lines of Caesar, but underestimatingly, as the task was of Herculean order. Next my naivety with the machine in itself is an interesting story.. but may be some other time.

After that day it was all downhill. Kind will be so humble a word for my benevolent mentor for gifting 3 days to search for accommodation, which near such SEZs is spread ubiquitously as criminals in assembly, PYTs in C.P. and grammatical mistakes in my blog. A learned friend had warned that at first day in office forget tasks the biggest question is finding someone to talk...but not in mine. The cordially welcoming crowd posed the question of selection and filtering. In my initial encounters with strangers I come with a low pass filter in terms of voicing my opinion but in my team we all were mostly silent types hence from first day itself we talked at lengths. Leaving me there was no other MBA guy so no banal exchanges were asked and we gelled in smoothly. Accommodation acquired, introduction done, terms established all I needed was work to bring the best of me.

Days came and gone, weeks came and gone, a month came and gone.. accommodation acclimatized, introduction stretched to past and future, terms fostered into bonds... yet all I needed was some work.. (Yeah I know You Know Why). Management talks about initiatives..which I took. Feeling of unemployment is heavy but believe me it grows far heavier when in an office. I talked with mentor.. I asked the mentor... and (if some artistic liberty be allowed) I begged too. Still apart from some occasional ppt stuffs all I have been asked is to play a silent observer in board room meetings, passing intelligent smiles & nodding agreeably on mostly technical points which goes over my head. Not to forget for these mere acts I have been rewarded with range of goodies and two free entertainment trips.

With time I have come to the realization that my high offerings and their modest requirement are never going to resonate, hence I have lowered my aspiration bar for the time being. Paulo Coelho postulated and Shahrukh khan spread the theory that how entire universe conspires to fetch you what you seek with all your heart... but like all other laws, except the one by a Murphy and a Newton fella, this too has turned up to be an elusive one, as of now. Yet all this adversity hasn't yet been able to undermine my belief. Someday sure I will find myself a job which will bring the best in me. I shall overcome one day.. Yes I can. Till then I am like the Mussadilal of my own office sharing my misery to a page.

P.S.: Between I have tried seeking opportunities to flaunt some Kotler gyan in the cafeteria but this dream too is still latent for the lack of an adorable audience. Murphy, Get off my Kundali Will You!!